General Category > General Discussion
Games vs Relationships
Maben:
Wow, I didn't realize that my comment had sparked such a debate and even it's own thread. Guess I need to follow up when I make such statements. I hope my original post in the other thread didn't get misconstrued and taken out of context. All I meant was, if I was ON A DATE with my fiancee and was actively looking for and purchasing video games it would not go over well. The whole idea of a date is that we are off spending time with each other and being social together.
Perhaps if I was to walk by an amazing deal (where such a scenario would occur I can't even give you a hypothetical) I could probably make a quick purchase but that's about it haha.
As for accepting me, she definitely has. She knows I love video games and I love collecting them, and she never gives me grief when I come home with a few games or I'm making covers while we watch TV or something. She would (and has) given me grief if I devote too much time to playing a game and/or ignoring responsibilities in favor of a hobby, but that's life. As another poster said, it's all about balancing what you want to do and what you have to do. I would not give her up for all the games in the world, but if she was going to force me to give up gaming and collecting as a hobby I wouldn't be marrying her in the first place (if that makes sense). She's accepted that I like playing Magic and video games, but they are something that I do on "my" time.
Edit: Also, it's not that she's against gaming, it's just not her thing. She doesn't like most video games (though I have found a few that she enjoys playing with me), she seems to find them boring. I could be playing a game that is extremely engrossing for me and I can't get enough of it, and she can pick up the same game and tell me "I'm bored" 5 minutes later. As for the people saying I should ditch her and find someone else; that seems about as narrow-minded as trying to change someone. No one is going to be compatible 100% with their mate, a lot of a relationship is about compromise.
madrocsz:
I am married, have a 3 year old kid.
My wife, while not against what I do, follows under the "dont ask, dont tell" guidelines. She doesnt want to see what I pay for games etc and I always have my family budget come first. This is mainly due to I re-invest money I make from buying extras etc back into buying what I want.
She isnt a huge gamer but enjoys watching me play some games, she works at a game store (which I got her the job a while back, however I no longer work for) so enjoys my feedback and uses me as go-to insight or knowledge to help her perform her job better. I had a small collection, more so what I had left over from when I was younger when we started dating, however if I did play anything it was mostly PC games. This was about 9 years ago. She has made comments at how staggering my collection is now, but honestly thinks it looks neat that I keep it organized and orderly, especially with the use of this site and making cases versus loose carts everywhere. I keep everything in a separate room, a mancave of sorts, so she doesn't have to stare at it all day.
I work an overnight job, take college courses online and am a dad and husband, its a lot to juggle, and thus my game time isn't near what it used to be. I still play often but usually when everything else for the day is accomplished and we have spent some time together. I have done some ridiculous things to get a deal and she has actually encouraged it as she knows its something that truly gets me excited.
Several people have mentioned balance, which is true, if your partner is supportive or at the very least can deal with your hobby, they should expect the same in return.